Wednesday 19 August 2015

When loving him hurts...Chapter 1

She had been married to her abusive ex-husband for 5 years; they had a three year old beautiful daughter named Mbali. I first met this lady in a bus & somehow we ended up talking about relationships & her abusive marriage. At first i thought it was going to be one of those beautiful love stories of how & where they met, the things he used to do for her... but then it turned out not to be one of those girl met a guy, they fall in love, get married, have children & live happily ever after kind of stories. She smiled as she started telling her story...

“I met my then loving ex-husband in a conference. He looked so handsome & well dressed. He introduced himself as James & I remember telling him that I was going to call him James Bond (laughed).The conversation continued & we ended up exchanging numbers. Six months down the line he married me & bought a beautiful house. I remember how envious my single friends were, they all prayed for a man like James...he was every woman's dream & i was thankful for having him as my husband.

When I became pregnant James started treating me badly. He became cold and I started questioning if being with him was a right choice. We started arguing a lot & those arguments turned into punches. Before I knew it, he would disappear for a couple of days & come back drunk. I spent most of the times lonely & stressed, I couldn't even tell my friends & family what I was going through...I had to paint a picture of a happy wife.

I remember lying on the bathroom floor; I couldn't believe how ill I felt. I lifted my head over the bowl and was sick, my husband was nowhere to be found & his cell phone was off. I tried calling an ambulance & luckily it arrived within 20 minutes. I gave birth to my daughter before we could even get to the hospital. She was so tiny but adorable. I couldn't even put her down. She was the most beautiful gift I had ever received & that's when I realized that I had to protect her from her own father.

” The tears began to flow slowly at first & then became heavier as I listened to a beautiful but damaged woman's story. Sindy was wrapped in despair & her beautiful face still displayed dark bruises she had received Months back from her ex-husband. She started sobbing & couldn't continue for at least three minutes to be exact as if she knew that I wanted her to stop talking. I wanted to comfort her but somehow I couldn't. She had gone through so much & the words "I'm sorry" were the last thing she wanted to hear, she needed more than that. She knew that her pain was better shared with a stranger, a woman who knew nothing about her, someone who'd never judge her & that someone happened to be me.

"I'm sorry" she said for what? I asked
"For telling you all this, it’s just that I needed a shoulder to cry on "
You don't have to apologize
"The awkward thing is I haven’t even introduced myself” she said …

...to be continued